the official student-produced news site for Saint Stephen's Episcopal School

the Gauntlet

the official student-produced news site for Saint Stephen's Episcopal School

the Gauntlet

the official student-produced news site for Saint Stephen's Episcopal School

the Gauntlet

The PDA is not okay

Lately, public displays of affection on campus have skyrocketed, and I am here to say, ew.
The+cubbies+on+campus+have+become+landmines.++Its+time+for+the+PDA+to+go.
Sarabeth Wester
The cubbies on campus have become landmines. It’s time for the PDA to go.

Dear fellow upper schoolers: it isn’t Valentine’s Day, but rumor has it that the upper school is beginning to look a bit like the set of a Hallmark rom-com. The buzz on campus is that couples are starting to become too comfortable displaying affection with one another in the public arena. Now, I’m not here to rain on anyone’s parade, but we need to address the elephant in the room—or should I say the love birds on the lunch tables

Picture this: It’s lunchtime, and you’re ready to devour that sandwich you’ve been daydreaming about all morning, but alas, the freshman couple on the bench next to you is pawing at one another like baby kittens. It’s like trying to enjoy a movie while someone loudly crunches popcorn in the seat behind you—annoying and uncomfortable.

And don’t even get me started on the obstacle course the typical Falcon faces on his or her five-minute sprint between classes. Navigating through a sea of intertwined limbs and blockading freshmen in the halls is not my idea of a morning workout. Dodging PDA landmines to get to Spanish class feels like I’m auditioning for a low-budget dance competition.

Now, I get it, we’re all teenagers seeking love and affection, but generally speaking, it’s better to keep the passionate displays to a more private setting. Our school’s major walkways are starting to resemble a romantic comedy climax.

I propose a crash course:  Public Displays of Affection Etiquette 101. Hand-holding? Cute. Pecks on the cheek? Precious. An arm around the shoulders? Lovely. But anything more than that, folks, let’s wait for out-of-school hours.

Being a Saint Stephen’s Falcon is an honor, and we are given countless opportunities to better ourselves and our futures, but that does not include climbing on other students like a jungle gym. We’re here for an education, not a high school version of 90 Day Fiance

The not-so-private displays of affection are not only drawing the attention of us students but staff as well.

According to an anonymous faculty member, teachers should not know who their students are dating.

“The PDA brings me into a part of my students’ lives that I really try not to cross into,” our source said. 

On occasion, teachers have had to separate students as they were directly in front of the teacher’s classroom, providing faculty with unwanted entertainment while they ate their lunch.

Now, as we navigate through this labyrinth of teenage romance, let’s not let our campus become the set of the next great Netflix romance. 

Let’s dial the PDA down a notch. Save the dramatic embraces for the school play. Our hallways should be the stage for academic prowess, not the backdrop to a commercial for Kay Jewelers.  No, people.  Every kiss should not begin in with a cubby.

4
View Comments (6)
About the Contributors
Sarah Black, Staff Writer
Sarah Black is a junior at Saint Stephen's and a first year member of the Gauntlet. Aside from being a staff writer, she enjoys spending her free time snorkeling and watching Zack and Cody. She also enjoys spending time with her two golden retrievers, and her favorite color is gray.
Sarabeth Wester, Creative Director/Artist
Sarabeth Wester is a senior on The Gauntlet with four years under her belt of hard work in the newsroom as our Creative Director. Her favorite color is purple, she has a cat and a dog who she loves dearly, and she plays video games in her free time - her favorite being Fallout 4 even with it's imperfections. Her favorite movies are Days of Thunder, Top Gun, and Wall-E - she believes everyone should watch them at least once.  
Translate

Comments (6)

Comments are expected to be respectful and constructive. We do not permit the use of profanity, crude language, personal attacks, or the use of language that might be interpreted as libelous. Commenters must provide their name; no anonymous comments will be accepted.
All the Gauntlet Picks Reader Picks Sort: Newest

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

  • Jill SkardoutosDec 1, 2023 at 10:20 am

    Well written!

    Reply
  • Jeannine ElishaNov 28, 2023 at 9:10 pm

    This was so entertaining. I can’t wait to read your next piece.

    Reply
  • Olivia ThorntonNov 28, 2023 at 12:17 pm

    Well written and entertaining! Get it, Girl!!

    Reply
  • Sawyer GirgisNov 28, 2023 at 10:07 am

    BEST OF SNO.

    Reply
  • Jackson NealisNov 27, 2023 at 4:20 pm

    This is hilarious. Well done.

    Reply
  • Evie BaugherNov 27, 2023 at 2:28 pm

    This is is amazing Sarah I absolutely love it!

    Reply